love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
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Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
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I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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