Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
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the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
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so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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