Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Everclear isn't food dammit
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize