Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize