Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize