Texts From Last Night

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  (760): View more from California

  ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!

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  (760): ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!! http://tfl.nu/73h7
  Replies (68) Good night (1426) Bad night (426) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.

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  (604): the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick. http://tfl.nu/jjwi
  Replies (27) Good night (6355) Bad night (558) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders

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  (248): so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders http://tfl.nu/1b2g
  Replies (21) Good night (4302) Bad night (993) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table

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  (610): Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table http://tfl.nu/dmz2
  Replies (92) Good night (841) Bad night (4930) Order T-Shirt
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.

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  (305): Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level. http://tfl.nu/s74q
  Replies (5) Good night (2830) Bad night (766) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time

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  (570): she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time http://tfl.nu/kzmt
  Replies (11) Good night (3302) Bad night (962) Order T-Shirt
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.

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  (334): Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram. http://tfl.nu/7u9p
  Replies (2) Good night (1552) Bad night (651)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.

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  (402): 2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America. http://tfl.nu/5vl1
  Replies (4) Good night (1513) Bad night (529) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking

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  (443): Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking http://tfl.nu/hur0
  Replies (6) Good night (626) Bad night (1472) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD

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  (815): i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD http://tfl.nu/w0y8
  Replies (3) Good night (637) Bad night (410) Order T-Shirt
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?

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  (260): If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok? http://tfl.nu/erl3
  Replies (3) Good night (1350) Bad night (421) Order T-Shirt
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  (210): View more from Texas

  You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL

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  (210): You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL http://tfl.nu/gpbu
  Replies (6) Good night (1768) Bad night (332) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.

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  (508): I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn. http://tfl.nu/62bv
  Replies (10) Good night (544) Bad night (1022) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer

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  (513): He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer http://tfl.nu/5hwv
  Replies (2) Good night (671) Bad night (332) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.

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  (360): ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present. http://tfl.nu/50t2
  Replies (1) Good night (483) Bad night (370) Order T-Shirt

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