we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
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