no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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