WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
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