Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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