i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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