I am puke
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
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shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
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I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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