Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
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