i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
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