I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize