Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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