2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Enjoy the penises
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize