you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
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