You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize