either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this hospital has no fireball
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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