She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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