I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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