why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize