What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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