Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize