Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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