I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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