For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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