jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize