He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
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Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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