He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize