Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize