She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize