I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize