What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize