ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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