could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
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I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
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im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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