Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
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