my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
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And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
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You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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