just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
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