i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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