O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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