got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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