If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize