What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
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Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
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Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
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