As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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