i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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