In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex on a roof
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize