Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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