my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize